WHERE ANGELS FEAR TO TREAD....
Dear Bob
Scene One
It has come to my attention that you are in need of “ a few dollars more,or as Clint Eastwood would say Do you feel lucky well do ya Punk!”
Or as Dr. Evil from Austin Powers might say,” about a little more than 1/20th of a billion dollars” muhahahaha” My math may be a little off but you get the picture.
Scene Two
It came to my attention that a certain speaker at the Eagles lair whom I will call Space On ( rhymes with Jason) talked about the end times and referred to the congregation as either sheep or goats. Just because I love that analogy, I will help teach Jason er I mean Space On what is actually meant by that. Trust me. It is killer!
Scene Three
The Movie - “Men Who Stare at Goats” starring George Clooney and a host of other big name Hollywood stars is coming out or by the time you receive this is already out. The director of the movie is Grant Heslov. ( Important to remember Grant's name )
Scene Four
Pastor Bob , asking for a “few dollars more” to help with additions and sub contracting, mortgages, and a whole lot of other headaches that a normal church goer does not deal with.
Scene Five
The Happy Eagles in Training jamming away to all of the suite sounds of Salvation through Jesus. Start the tear train WOO WOO The Eagle has left the station!
Scene Six
Enter Chief Crazy Captain Christo ( What?) Yes the man with the Wild background and a Fear No Evil attitude says, “ Hey Pastor Bob, what you need is some real ENERGY FORCE behind your team of Great All Stars. Please let me help you out with a simple strategy. I have this CRAZY notion that I am supposed to let you lead us all into the PROMISED LAND which I presume to be PARADISE. But before I let you have the REIGNS, I need a little help from you and all of Eagle Brook. Pay attention Bob!
Scene Seven
It will start with an ENERGY plan. I will give you all the rights and such to this ENERGY plan if you will only agree to tithe me ten percent when we get this thing going. It will probably take a few months to set up but once set up, I will give you all the tools to run this baby on your own and if run properly you might never have to ask for money again as long as you shall live. This is what I call The Peak of Curiosity. Either you are intrigued and want to know more or you have already written this off as a quack job. To put it bluntly like Bob Dylan , ....” You either got Faith or you got unbelief and there aint no neutral ground...”
Scene Eight
The Movie Rights- I keep everything about this plan under wraps like a huge Christmas Present. I will let you in on a little secret. This present never stops giving and since this is the year of Chilly and Cheese ( Brad Childress and Brett Favre # 4-giving!). If you would like to find out more talk amongst your congregation of Eagles and let me know if you want to “ learn how to fly”
No comments:
Post a Comment